Anatomically correct chair lines up with your bones and organs.
some of y’all have never gone to make a happy birthday card, and thought “i don’t need to trace it. i know how big letters should be,” and begun with a big-ass H, followed by a big-ass A and… oh, no! oh, god! ok, all right. real skinny P with a high hump, and then we’ll put the second P below the hump of that first P, sort of like a motorcycle sidecar situation. and now you have no room for the Y, so you do a kind of curled-up noodle Y. block letters and cursive look good together. and then you go to write “Birthday” and you totally forget the lesson you just learned with “Happy.” you’re like, “yeah, but the past is the past. big-ass B. surely more letters will fit in the same space,” and it really shows.
Some of you have never picked up the hit podcast, Welcome To Nightvale written by Joseph Fink and Jeffery Cranor and listened to a whole bunch of episodes in a passion, caught up to the most recent episode, ended up getting tired for waiting for a new episode, stopped listening for around a year and still feel guilty about it and it shows.
agent: this is area 51, where the aliens live
me: cool
agent: and over there is area 69, where the aliens… uh…
me: what
agent: ….
me: what do they do there